Planned Love

He obviously didn't think that way in his heart, but when the words came to his mouth, it was even more cruel. Sheng Yun, have we ever had love before? "More, but all of them are mutual."    

    

In that instant, I saw his eyes go completely cold.    

    

I knew that all the affection in his heart had been completely shut off to me at that moment.    

    

I could feel all the pain in his heart, because the pain in my heart was no less than his.    

    

We are all the same people, who treat heartlessness as deep emotion, who say things that are not true, who are stubborn, and who are true.    

    

I still love him. But we can't go back.    

    

We looked into each other's eyes, tears streaming down our faces. We were saying the words that hurt each other the most, but it didn't make our hearts feel any better. On the contrary, his heart ached so much that he felt like he was going to die.    

    

"Mutual Utilization... "Ha ha," he sneered, quickly wiping away the tears on his face. His stern face was calmer than before. "I should have known earlier that I shouldn't have fallen for a woman like you."    

    

"A woman like me …" I repeated it in a low voice, smiled sadly, and said lightly, "Yes, I should have seen it earlier. Now, are you regretting it? "    

    

I looked at him with a splitting headache, but my eyes were cold.    

    

At this moment, his face was calm. Just a moment ago, it had been turbulent, but now there was no trace at all. Those eyes were so still that they didn't seem to have just shed tears, and even the tinge of redness had faded from them.    

    

He was silent, but looked at me coldly, as if he wanted to see my heart through my body. There was a murderous look in his eyes.    

    

"I'm going, you should rest." He then turned around and walked out of the room.    

    

A loud noise suddenly came from the kitchen.    

    

His footsteps paused, but still … He left decisively.    

    

I knew that this time, his departure had completely taken away that heart that loved me. After that, I won't feel this kind of warmth anymore.    

    

I ran to the kitchen. The medicine jar exploded.    

    

The kitchen counter, walls, and oil hood were littered with dregs of medicine. The fire was still raging, and the pot had been broken in half.    

    

I quickly shut off the fire and started to clean up the mess with a rag. When I squatted down and picked up the precious herbs that had fallen to the ground, I suddenly felt a heartfelt sadness. I knelt on the ground and couldn't help but hold onto the broken fragments of the medicine jar as I cried …    

    

I did not expect to cry so bitterly.    

    

I held the fragment, as if holding the broken heart of Sheng Yun, crying incessantly in grief.    

    

I looked at the room full of dregs, I smelled the smell of the medicine, I looked at the blood that had been his all night after he had been blown to pieces, and for a moment I felt really cold, cold enough to fail a man's heart, cold enough to reject the last of the warmth.    

    

I picked up the dregs from the ground and chewed them with tears in my eyes. It was bitter and bitter, and for a moment I felt like a lost child who had lost his way, whose path had become a mess, whose possessions had disappeared, leaving nothing but a distant end in sight.    

    

Nanny Liu appeared behind me at some point. She sighed softly and helped me up from the kitchen, which was full of dregs. She held me in her arms like a mother, stroking my head as she said, "Why? One day, you will understand, the world is good, or the embrace of a lover is the best and most solid ah! Sigh! "Poor child!"    

    

She sighed heavily, then hugged my head, gently shaking it as if she was trying to coax Zaizai, "Cry, cry, it's good to let it out, it's good to let it out …"    

    

Because of Auntie Xu's words, my tears gushed out like a spring as I choked with sobs, "Auntie, I've completely lost him. "From today onwards, I will lose him forever …"    

    

"If you feel regretful, then go chase after him. Maybe he hasn't left for too long. I'll call him right now." Nanny Liu listened to me and said.    

    

"No, Auntie, stop it. Let bygones be bygones. Tomorrow will be a new day. " At that moment, Nanny Liu's words suddenly made me, who had broken down in my emotions, withdraw. I quickly calmed down. I shook my head and resolutely told Nanny Liu.    

    

I wiped the tears off my face. Under Nanny Liu's astonished gaze, I squeezed out a smile and said, "Auntie, you should go to bed first." "Here, I'll take care of it."    

    

Nanny Liu then retracted her astonished gaze and patted me on the shoulder, saying meaningfully, "You young people are like newborn lambs. The more I tell you not to climb, the more you want to climb; the more I tell you not to move, the more you want to move. Sometimes I wish you would listen to the advice of our elders. But Auntie knew that Auntie had also walked over when she was young, and Auntie knew that as well. Go to bed, child, go! I'll take care of it here! "    

    

"Auntie, let me pack. This way, my heart will feel better. " I looked gratefully at Nanny Liu and said.    

    

"Alright, then go to sleep after you pack up." Hearing my words, Nanny Liu didn't stop me.    

    

"Well, I know. Auntie, hurry up and go to sleep. My friends and I are going out tomorrow, so I'll leave Zaizai to you. " I said to Nanny Liu.    

    

"Don't worry, I'll take care of him." Nanny Liu looked at me, gave me an extremely kind smile, and walked out.    

    

It was a quiet night, and my mind was already calm. I found a clean piece of gauze in the cupboard, picked up all the dregs, placed them on top of the gauze, wiped all the stains in the kitchen with a rag, put the medicine jar in a bag, and then carried it and the gauze out to the courtyard and buried it under the maple tree in the yard, as if I had buried my love with my own hands.    

    

I gave a devout bow and waved my hand, then went back into the bedroom and washed my hands and face. I lay there, staring at the ceiling, dazed, as if I had heard the harmonica again.    

    

I knew this song in my dreams. It was still the song he played for the first time, the heartbreaking song, "I just Like You"...    

    

Daybreak had come, and the sun shone through the white curtains into the room, casting a warm, soft glow on the floor.    

    

All the sadness from last night had been buried with the night and the moon yesterday.    

    

Early in the morning, Zaizai wanted to find me for the first time. When he woke up early in the morning, he shouted "Mom". Nanny Liu opened my door and put Zaizai down.    

    

Nanny Liu brought me some pills and hot water and told me, "This medicine was personally made by Sheng Yun when he went to find his doctor. It's said that the effect was good. Are you feeling better today?"    

    

"Auntie, let's not talk about him anymore, okay?" I looked at Nanny Liu and said softly.    

    

"Alright, since you don't want to talk about it, then don't." Nanny Liu nodded and handed me a packet of pills.    

    

I drank it all in one gulp with warm water. Zaizai leaned on my back, hooked his neck, and suddenly shouted, "Daddy!"    

    

"Zaizai, what did you say?" I turned my head and immediately hugged Zaizai.    

    

"Barbara's dad …" Zaizai kept uttering the syllables of "Daddy", which made my heart tighten.    

    

"Did Zaizai miss dad?" I held Zaizai in my arms and asked gently.    

    

He pointed to the door, his mouth babbling, as if he wanted me to go find Sheng Yun. So I carried him into the yard and said softly, "Zaizai, let's just rely on each other for survival in the future, okay? Dad, he has more important things to do. "    

    

Zaizai looked at me with a confused expression. Suddenly, he waved his small hand and excitedly shook it.    

    

I saw a car approaching from the distance. It turned out to be Tai Ziqian. Tai Ziqian often comes to me when he has nothing better to do. Zaizai already knew his car.    

    

I hugged Zaizai and smiled at him. Zaizai struggled to get down to walk, so I led him to Tai Ziqian's car. Tai Ziqian, wearing a casual sports coat, jumped up from the car with a vigorous posture. He held Zaizai high above his head and said with a smile, "Oh, looks like the little guy missed me. Waking up so early in the morning to welcome me? "    

    

"Yes, I came to welcome you." I said, smiling.    

    

He played along with Zaizai for a while, then put him in my arms. He opened the trunk and took out several colorful cars.    

    

He brought them out one by one, then smiled and said, "In the future, these toys will all be useful to little fellows. I specially brought it from my friend to save Auntie's strength. "    

    

Zaizai saw so many cars. He clapped his hands excitedly and struggled to get off, so I put him in the walker. He walked around excitedly with a grin on his face like an angel.    

    

Seeing this, Tai Ziqian patted Zaizai's head with a smile. He then reached out his hand to pinch my face and said, "I didn't sleep well last night. Why are you so haggard? "Could it be that you're so excited that you can't fall asleep because you want to soak in the hot spring with me?"    

    

Just as Tai Ziqian finished his sentence, a sound came from behind me. I turned my head and saw Nanny Liu standing in the doorway like a wooden chicken. The bell she was holding fell to the ground with a screeching sound.