C251
C251
Looking at the torrent of sarcasm below, along with the most malicious of taunts, as well as some groundless revelations, my heart crumbled.
Postpartum mother is prone to depression, coupled with a weak body, often do not know why cry, often caused me to be unable to rest through the night, my nerves are already disordered, sleeping a sound sleep is a luxury for me.
When I saw the article, I broke down and cried.
I did not expect to have faced so many difficulties in my life, but I did not let my psychological defense collapse. And now life in these trivial and trivial, but easily let me cry tears.
At this point, I finally know how much effort Nanny Liu had saved for me and how much effort she had put in for me after Zaizai was born.
It was only then that I realized that although it was hard for a woman to charge alone into a crowd of men, it was even more difficult when faced with the multiple responsibilities of the workplace, the mother, and the wife.
On one hand, my own body needs to be properly nurtured and the money needs to be taken care of properly. When I gave birth to Zaizai, I was too busy to take care of him, so I wanted to do my duty as a mother to him. In addition, I did my best to compensate Zaizai for his absence of a mother's love.
I have already discussed with Sheng Yun that I will temporarily give up my career until the end of the thousand-year lactation period.
On the other hand, this pregnancy had consumed a great deal of my energy and strength. My body and strength were far from what they had been before, and my state of mind had fallen to an all-time low.
That night, I had a big fight with Sheng Yun. Even I was surprised at the outburst.
I don't think I've ever been a narrow-minded woman.
But that night, when Sheng Yun went home and fell asleep due to exhaustion, I walked around the room alone for three whole hours with Qian Jin in my arms. However, Qian Jin still cried and didn't sleep, so I was on the verge of exploding.
At three in the morning, Zaizai was awoken by the sound of the daughter's wailing. He got up from the small bed, but no matter how nanny tried to persuade him, he insisted that his mother carry him … He could feel that the last of his energy had been used up, and his body and spirit had reached their limit.
I looked at Sheng Yun who was sleeping soundly. He seemed to have turned a deaf ear to everything in the room. He was still sleeping soundly and even snored slightly …
I was furious.
An uncontrollable anger welled up from within his body.
At this moment, Zaizai angrily threw away his bottle. The full bottle of milk hit my leg and the bottle shattered. The nanny looked at me in panic. The daughter in my hand cried until her face turned green, but she still refused to drink the milk.
At that moment, I suddenly put down the gold and shouted to Sheng Yun, "Sheng Yun, how do you sleep in this situation?"
Endless grievance rose from my chest, and my anger rose to ten feet.
I used to think I could control my emotions, but at that moment they were like a geyser volcano, uncontrollable.
Sheng Yun's entire body trembled when I shouted at him. He opened his eyes and looked around the room in confusion. Then, he got up and saw that Qian Jin and Zaizai were both crying.
The words that came out of his mouth was actually a rebuke: "It's already so late, why aren't you letting them sleep?"
There was no concern, no consideration, no so-called... Understand.
His words were undoubtedly adding fuel to the fire.
"Why are you sleeping when they're so noisy?" As I looked at this man, I suddenly felt that all my love had gone to waste. He was so unfamiliar to me.
"I haven't slept in three days, wife." Sheng Yun realized that something was wrong. He walked over and looked at Qian Jin and Zaizai on the ground with a helpless look on his face.
"Sis Ceng, can you coax Zaizai to sleep?" Sheng Yun instructed sister-in-law Zeng.
"I want my mother! "I want my mother!" Zaizai started to cry again.
Sheng Yun picked up the girl and she cried even harder because she was too reliant on me.
In the midst of our wailing, we suddenly had a quarrel we had never had before.
I always thought that Sheng Yun and I would not be an ordinary couple, we have our own style, we will not be dragged down by these trivial things.
But when I had two children, I realized that I was wrong. I was wrong.
When the words jumped out of my mouth, when I was filled with disappointment for this man, when I was so exhausted that I broke down, I suddenly felt a sense of loneliness.
I was able to survive so many hardships of the past.
But these trivial matters, I can't get by. I don't know where to go.
"Shubei, are you still you?" When I got to the end, Sheng Yun frowned at me. His eyes were filled with a sense of unfamiliarity.
His words stabbed me deeply.
"Why don't we switch? You grew up with them at home, so I went out and showed myself to them? " I looked at Sheng Yun and said sarcastically.
"I know you're tired, and I know you're having a hard time. But before, you weren't such an emotional woman. " He came over and took my hand. When he took me in his arms, I saw him frown.
Before, I was slender and slender, but now, I have become a colossus, he even took a bit of trouble to carry me into his arms.
When I pushed him away, I said, "Did you feel like you were holding a cow?"
"How could that be? You are my wife, how can I turn my back on you? " He frowned at me, his face a mask of exhaustion. "I've been so busy with the company recently, I …"
"Yes, you are tired, you are tired, the first thing you say when you go home is that you are tired, have you ever thought that I am more tired than you at home? Do I know what kind of life I've had for more than a year? Do you know how sad I am? "Now that I've become like this, I don't even have the courage to go out anymore. I've been reported by the media like that, and I've been written about like that. Have you ever come forward to protect me?" Endless complaints rushed out of my mouth.
It's over. I never thought that I, Xu Shubei, would become a grudge that even I felt disgusted with.
"Shubei!" He gave a deep growl and made a stop gesture at me. He looked at his watch and said, "I'm really tired. I have to get up and go to the airport at five o'clock. I'm going to two cities today. I'll probably be home by midnight. I really have to rest. I have to meet some important clients tomorrow. You can coax Qian Jin to sleep, I'll go to the sofa. "
No hugs, no comfort, no understanding.
Sheng Yun sighed, rolled up a blanket, closed the door and went into the living room. This is the first time we've slept apart since we were married.
Qian Jin had fallen asleep while crying. Her hands were still in her mouth. Zaizai sat on the ground and waved his hands excitedly as he played with the car.
"Shubei, my wife is going to have a baby soon. It's the rule in our hometown that I have to go back and sit with the son, I …" she said to me, exhausted.
"Sis Ceng, how can you resign at this time?" I asked incredulously, turning my head to look at her.
"I... This... I have no other way. Child, it's too hard to bring you along. I … I'm losing my nerve now, and I don't get a good night's sleep every day. " Sister-in-Law Zeng faltered, but she already had the determination to leave.
"Alright, then I'll settle your salary for tomorrow. You can go to sleep now." At that moment, I completely lost all my will to fight.
I covered Qian Jin with a blanket and walked over. I sat on the ground and played with Zaizai's toys. Afterwards, I tried to find a way to hug him in my embrace and coax him to sleep.
Afterwards, even I didn't know how I fell asleep. Before I fell asleep, my mind was filled with countless thoughts, countless thoughts … I suddenly felt so far away from my former self that I didn't know when I would be at the end of the road, exhausted and exhausted.
I began to miss the life of a fresh horse, the self in a state of charge, ready to burn.
When I woke up the next day, Sheng Yun had already left. I was so tired that I slept on the floor with Zaizai in my arms. I slept on the crawling mat for Zaizai, and we both had a thin blanket over us. It was the bed that Sheng Yun had carried to the sofa last night.
When I woke up, Qian Jin and Zaizai were still asleep. I had a nervous breakdown, so I couldn't sleep for long every day. But when I looked at the two small, vigorous faces, and saw them lying peacefully before me, I felt that all this had been worth it.
That day, sister-in-law Zeng left, I asked Nanny Liu to help me find a reliable nanny in the market. Nanny Liu came back to look at the two children. Seeing that I was so tired, she said weakly, "Shubei, Mom really can't bear to see you work so hard. But Mom has no other choice, the old man can't get out of bed, nor can he leave anyone to take care of you. Sigh! You look haggard! After drinking so much medicine every day, when will it be the end? "
That's right … When is the head?
He woke up early in the morning. Today was yet another long day. While Nanny Liu was there, I fed Zaizai's breakfast and drove him to kindergarten. I was still on the way, when Nanny Liu made a few phone calls saying that the daughter had vomited milk again and the daughter's forehead was a little hot as if she had a fever …
When I sent Zaizai to kindergarten, I let out a long breath of relief. I looked at the countless young mothers who were like me, all of them had the same yellow and tired look on their faces, but in their eyes, there was also the same strong and happy look.
A woman is weak, but a mother is strong. As a mother, it was a contest that was deeply rooted in one's heart. It was a war that defeated one's own.
I looked at Zaizai's small back, then turned around and drove home, ready for another war without smoke.
While I was waiting at the traffic lights, I suddenly saw a red Ferrari next to my car. The woman in the car turned around with her sunglasses on and gave me a weird smile …